We go out of our way to emphasize that you do your research when looking for the right San Diego defense lawyer because you don’t want to end up with someone inexperienced, but even the average not-so-great real life attorney will have nothing on some of the outrageously bad lawyers on television. Here are a few of the worst fictional lawyers around, courtesy of San Marcos defense lawyer Peter M. Liss:

Lionel Hutz: The attorney of choice for The Simpsons probably should have been disbarred a dozen times and it’s amazing that Homer, Marge and Bart don’t already have life sentences given how many crimes the two have committed and how terrible their attorney is. A few highlights of Hutz’ notoriously terrible practice:

• He claims to be a graduate of Princeton School of Law despite the fact that Princeton hasn’t offered legal degrees since 1852. (On a side note, Oceanside defense attorney Peter Liss’ legal degree from UC Berkeley is 100% real and he’ll be happy to show it to you in person to prove it.)
• Hutz’s firm, I Can’t Believe It’s A Law Firm!, is located inside a strip mall and Lionel also offers shoe repair services. We’re not saying you should automatically discount a firm located in a strip mall (though it doesn’t usually inspire confidence), but if you see a lawyer in North County that also fixes shoes, we suggest running the other way.
• He’s had to change his name twice, becoming Miguel Sanchez and subsequently Dr. Nguyen Van Phuoc. That’s a good sign that something isn’t going right.
• Most importantly, Lionel loses almost every single case and while a good attorney will never guarantee you will win your case, he or she should still be able to show you that they have a proven track record of winning cases similar to yours.

Saul Goodman: We previously discussed one of Goodman’s clients, Skyler White, and while things worked out decently well for her, we wouldn’t suggest following her and Walter’s lead when it comes to legal representation.

• Saul has committed fraud more times than some lawyers have been in front of a jury. While that wouldn’t always be something you could find out about as you research the right criminal attorney for your case, if you do find out something like that about a lawyer, run the other way!
• Like Hutz, Saul operates his firm out of a strip mall -though that’s a big step up from his office in the back of a nail salon. Again, while a strip mall office isn’t necessarily a deal-breaker, we think being tucked away behind a salon is.

Matthew Murdoch: We already discussed many of the legal issues in Daredevil, but we din’t evaluate Murdoch’s skills behind the bench. In fact, there are a lot of good reasons to work with Nelson and Murdoch -including the fact that the two are willing to work for pies. Unfortunately, that doesn’t change the fact that Matthew isn’t the greatest lawyer in Hell’s Kitchen. A few of his biggest flaws include:

• Matthew’s work as a superhero was bound to get in the way of his work as an attorney, which is a big part of season two. We already discussed how his vigilantism could get him disbarred, but as it turns out, his tardiness and lack of preparation in the Frank Castle trial could also leave him losing his profession. That’s because defense lawyers in Carlsbad and elsewhere have a duty of loyalty to their clients and violating this duty could result in disbarment. While you might not be able to tell ahead of time if someone is fighting crime at night, you certainly don’t want an unprepared attorney -especially one who could face disbarment. That’s why it’s so important to properly evaluate a lawyer before hiring them on to fight your case.

Obviously most real lawyers will be a lot more credible than these intentionally bad fictional examples, but if you want a top criminal defense attorney in Rancho Bernardo, schedule a free consultation with Peter M. Liss. Call (760) 643-4050 any time, day or night.

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